on PC Trash talk

So the newly joined coworker  out of sheer enthusiasm for her project started bugging me regularly for one thing or the other.
But man does it take the load off you back with some one qualified on your rooster.
NJC:  ” I need access to MS Access”
Me:   ” No, Can do. Ask the IT installation dept.”  {haha access to access}
NJC: ” I need ms office to work in my office. can’t be running around using a new system every time.”
Me: ” (with the calmness of Buddha) No, Can do. Ask the budget people for anew PC” {haha office for office}
NJC: ” How did you fix that sql query? Are you God – Awesome ?”
Me:  ” God – Awesome. yes. ” {twiddling the pen drive with pre fabricated queries }
NJC: “ Boss told me I could use that un-used server for my passion project of quantifying unknown parameters that’ll fit into an unknown equation as the addendum to an unknown project”
Me: “ That’s a PC which thinks it’s a server. Hence it’s useless for your passion project.” (That’s what the IT guy told me !)
NJC: “ You just know how to make my day” (in a seething sarcastic I-wish-I-could-drive-a-dragger-down-your-throat tone)
Me: “ It’s all for the greater good.”